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Posts by: "Lakeside Food Sales"

So, you just inherited a downtown warehouse from your Great Uncle Lester. The property is nice to own, but your thoughts immediately turn to what that building might contain.

Great Uncle Lester was a strange duck with a pension for the unique, so just maybe he stored his secret vintage car collection there. Clandestine art pieces? Stocks and bonds? Jewels? Oh, jewels! You know he was no fool.

You throw open the doors and allow your eyes to adjust as the rays fall ever so gently on…10,000 Sony VHS units. Mind you, these are mint in the box, baby! You quickly realize that perhaps Great Uncle Lester was a fool and you are now the shame-faced owner of obsolete inventory. Whatever are you to do?

Good gracious! The obituary for this technology was in the paper long before your old uncle took his last breath. You remember reading VHS’ 2005 obit in the Washington Post:

“VHS — the beloved videotape format that bravely won the war against Betamax and charmed millions of Americans by allowing them to enjoy mindless Hollywood entertainment without leaving their homes — has died at the age of 29. It passed away peacefully after a long illness caused by chronic technological insignificance and a lack of director’s commentary tracks.”

You would love to just shut the doors and light a match, but you don’t have a match. Your mind is racing. Give them as gifts to everyone you know for every event for the rest of your life? Keep them in their boxes and build a fort? Sink them in the river? Ship them back to China? Uh, did they even want them when they made them?

Wait a minute! Doesn’t Lakeside Food Sales say there is no product too large or too small? Don’t they claim that there is no product that they cannot move? Shoot, they import, export, liquidate, distribute, and salvage.

I know they’d tell me, “Hey, contact us! We can move Great Uncle Lester’s VHS machines with no problem. We’ll find them all good homes where people will use them to watch great VHS tapes like Rambo and Top Gun.” Hey, I have copies of those too.

Politicians, scientists, and philanthropists voiced their opinions on the best venture of the 20th century, they surprisingly agreed on one recipient. What was it? The dollar store of course!

Once a novelty of the ’50s when the geniuses at Dollar General got the ball rolling, dollar stores now dot our landscape. Wherever our nation’s proudest monuments stand and most celebrated landscapes repose, you can be guaranteed to find everything you need for a buck.

Big Lots, Dollar Tree, Family Dollar, Meijer, and Menards are the heavyweights if you are looking for a resourceful place to unload all of your pennies. And don’t worry if you have coffee cans of pennies saved up because these stores are really jam-packed with goods.

Here is some of what you can buy (big breath): gum, candy, nuts, marshmallows, chocolate bars, chocolate syrup, chocolate cereal, nacho cheese, pork rinds, moist towelettes, towels, socks, underwear (male, female, child, and sometimes for the dog), bathrobes, soap, shampoo, shower curtains, shower caddies, shower radios, bathroom scales (another big breath), toilet bowl brushes, toilet bowl cleaners, CD’s, DVD’s, TV’s, couches, hammocks, boys’ toys, girls’ toys, baby toys, luggage, fake plants, real plant food, lawn mowers, grills, Valentine’s Day stuff, St. Patrick’s Day stuff, Easter stuff, Fourth of July stuff, Halloween stuff, Thanksgiving stuff (one last breath), Christmas stuff, and magnets. Note: this list is meant to be representative, not comprehensive.

In other words, Lakeside Food Sales scours the globe for anything and everything that people have too much of, don’t need anymore, or oddly enough think is out of style. If it’s canned, pickled, freeze dried, shrink wrapped, boxed up, and generally packaged like it’s Midas’s gold, you’ll find it for a buck. Guaranteed. Lakeside Food Sales (don’t let the name fool you — they cart it all) are masters of importing here and exporting there until it all lands under one roof.

If you have goods you want gone, please contact us so we may sell them for a buck.

Children, did you hear? There is a surplus of delicious Del Monte spinach! That’s right! You don’t have to cut back on your favorite spinach recipes: spinach dip, spinach burgers, creamed spinach, and the blue ribbon winner –spinach brownies. I know that your parents control the purse strings, kids, so here’s a brief list of spinach’s health benefits:

1. 1 cup of spinach= 20% of the RDA of dietary fiber. Old people like your parents really need this to help them digest, avoid constipation, maintain low blood sugar, and curb overeating.

2. Spinach is so cool that it scares away all kinds of cancer.

3. There are two types of natural anti-inflammatory “epoxyxanthophylls” (things) in spinach.

4. Vitamin C, vitamin E, beta-carotene, manganese, zinc and selenium are found in spinach. They help prevent osteoporosis, atherosclerosis and high blood pressure.

5. Spinach lowers blood pressure. That is until you have to argue with your parents to make them eat it.

6. You won’t gain night vision, but you can help yourself avoid macular degeneration and cataracts.

7. You thought the dietary fiber from #1 was great, but spinach contains 337% of the RDA of vitamin A.

8. The extra vitamin A fights psoriasis, keratinization, acne and even wrinkles. Don’t eat spinach and you’ll look like a shar pei.

9. Here’s a big number — one cup of boiled spinach provides over 1,000% of the RDA of vitamin K which strengthens bones.

10. Vitamin K doesn’t let bad calcification form, so you will be more likely to avoid strokes and cardiovascular disease.

11. Vitamin K also protects your nerves by adding a good fat around their sheaths.

Kids, it falls to you to teach your parents about spinach’s rock stardom. They are too lame to see the truth. And if their health doesn’t get them headed towards the car, put a zing in their step by explaining to them that this produce will be available at the wholesale price. That’s right — the highest quality spinach you love at a liquidated cost, all thanks to Lakeside Food Sales.

Okay, so I’m looking out the window of the 31st floor, the den for a hundred or more stock brokers all working the phones and watching the zig- and-zag of stock movements across a banks of monitors…and I’m thinking about the my next 50 phone calls I gotta make to help me make quota, something I’ve not done for the two weeks I’ve been here.

Then, I get the phone call.

“I’ve gotta a deal on a whole lot of FCOJ,” said the caller without identifying himself. I thought nothing of it and was kind of glad I had this special caller with maybe a deal that only I might know about.

“Give me some more,” I said bravely.

“How ‘bout the whole darn lot. But you’ve gotta act fast, because if you don’t wanna buy, I’ll call the next guy,” he said.

I was fumbling around on my keyboard to re-boot my darn system and I didn’t want to lose this deal of deals. What the heck, I mean, I’m sure I’d be buying this full lot of FCOJ stock at a great discount with enough
spread to pass it along to some of my cold call prospects.

Go for it, I told myself. I need this FCOJ deal badly.

“Alright. I’ll take the whole darn lot, but this better be a hopping deal or I won’t trade with you again,” I said it with vim and was sure he thought I was a seasoned broker.

On my way into work the next day, the sight unfolding outside the entrance to the office tower was unsettling, to say the least. Two semi trucks were parallel parked and I knew the delivery was for me. The signage on the trucks read, “Buy the premium Juice, Frozen Concentrate Orange Juice

When I got off the elevator, I knew I wouldn’t have to worry about making quota anymore. In fact, I was not even SALVAGE. I was a FREEZE DRIED FRUIT and might as well go back to my job at the GROCERY store.

Well, I didn’t bother going to my desk as I couldn’t get to it anyway. In fact, the whole darn office was milling around the hallways and everyone was asking, “Who ordered all this damn OJ?!!”

The next best thing for me was when I clicked on contact us and I really put my SURPLUS ITEMS experience to work.

'Obsolete inventory' and the picnic plannerBoy, don’t we know how tough it is out there with businesses trying to stay above water…and even trying their hardest to put on a good show at their annual shindigs. Gotta give some credit to those decision-makers who want to go forth with the traditional company gatherings.

Take the big summer BBQ. Golly, it doesn’t take too many gelds to rent a park, but when you start adding up the food for 350 attendees, you’re into next year’s budget.

Furthermore, if you grab your shopping cart to load up at the name-brand grocery store you’re going to be spending part of the profit-sharing you’re hoping the company will eek out this year.

Not to worry. Adjust your thinking and earn the praise of your CFO. After all,  you’ve been the event planner for the past 35 years, and you’ve not missed a year in pulling off this much-anticipated summer frolic. OK, the last couple of years, you should up a day late…but chalk it up to a senior moment.

This year, though, is different. You discovered a super-duper retailer, Big Lots, that just opened in your area and you were as excited as punch to make your list and see all the savings going back into the company.

But buying “seconds” or  “closeouts” for the company picnic?  Well, think about it. In the first place, we’re not talking about leaking cans of orange juice or stale food lying about in broken boxes. No siree Bob. You see, when you’re talking about surplus goods, you’re dealing with a company that maybe needed to get rid of excess inventory, or maybe there was a package change that forced them to move the goods.

OK, so when I sat down to talk to the company president and his CFO and told them how excited I was to go and buy obsolete inventory, they came back with what I would call harassing comments.

“Obsolete?? If you think I’m going to feed our employees obsolete food, then, well….you’re obsolete,” said Fred the president.

“Yeah,” rejoined Cal the CFO, looking up from his 10-key.

Well, I pulled it off, and the food was beautiful with stuff like Del Monte pears, Dole fruit cocktail (who doesn’t love a can of this while watching Lawrence Welk?), Tropicana Orangeade Light and even something for me — the Del Monte Mixed Vegetables….on a plastic plate, I might add.

I retired at the end of the BBQ, actually after I ate my mixed veggies. But be sure to go to the contact us link to find out a lot more about all the distribution channels and excess inventory sales just waiting to make your next event a real…picnic.

chinese-herbal-medicine-to-treat-autoimmune-disordersBoy, do I feel silly. I left a trail of Tweets about how I was going into the freeze dried fruit business. Hey, I’ve done lots of things over the years, and managed to make a lot of money along the way. Nothing was going to keep me away from my latest brainstorm.

So, I loaded my van up down by the river six or eight times with boxes of ‘cots and prunes, after having five humongous freezers delivered to my home — it’s a 900 square foot condo on the ground floor. Man, I had all those box freezers all up to maximum temperature by the time I rolled in at midnight.

Well, I was up ‘till about 3 a.m. working on all those prunes and apricots…pitting, cleaning…pitting…cle…OK, it was a lot of work and I kept all of my social media friends updated on my progress.

Well, for some reason, being a city boy and all, I didn’t get the memo or part about what the “freeze” was in “freeze dried,” or anything about the whole darn process.

Needless to say, the next morning, when I proudly opened up my first freezer to check on my newly “freeze dried fruit,” I was stricken with one big stomach ache — I was looking at a 350-pound chunk of frozen prunes. Man, I thought a damn alien hopped in my freezer and expired or something.

And that wasn’t the only problem. You see, I had contacted hundreds of outlets like Big Lots and grammar and high schools and even the warden who ran our unfenced prison across town to tell them how I could bring them the best darn freeze-dried fruit they’d ever come across.

OMG! You don’t want to have a power outage when you’ve got a half ton of fruit all froze up in freezers encircling yours and three other condos. Whew. It was a veritable river of apricot and prune juice flowing through our nice campus — the dogs and cats loved it, but the owners told me they were up all night with their pets just keeping them comfortable…if you know what I mean.

OK, so this was one of those “hyperboles” to make a point about where to go if you need to stock up on inventory surplus items like Frozen Concentrate Orange Juice (FCOJ…is not a NASDAQ symbol to chase), and excess inventories that are sure to make your purchasing department.

Contact us for the straight-away way to benefit with surplus stock.

“This is Houston to the Space Shuttle crew.  Do you read me?  How’s it going out there.”

“Houston, we read you.  The view is amazing.  We’ve never seen anything more beautiful.  Seeing the earth from space is just incredible.  But, Houston, we do have a problem.  We never want to eat another piece of freeze dried fruit ever again.  Do you read me?

“Well, crew, we read you loud and clear and that is indeed a problem.  What on earth are we going to do with all that freeze-dried fruit?”

Hmmmm….  What do you think NASA should do?  Should they throw away every bag of freeze-dried fruit that they own?  Should they force all the new astronaut trainees to eat through 50 bags each as part of a new “Space Shuttle Induction Program?”  Should they do science experiments on lab rats to find out why the astronauts will no longer eat the freeze-dried fruits?  No, they shouldn’t do any of those things.

“Houston, we read you, and we think you should call Lakeside Foods.”

That’s it!  NASA won’t have to waste their precious bounty of freeze-dried fruits, nor will they have to feel any guilt about these leftover products, because Lakeside Foods will know exactly what to do with them.

At Lakeside Foods, if you have an excess of bulk items, whether it’s raw materials, food ingredients, or finished goods, we will gladly take it off your hands and put it into someone else’s.

We partner with companies like Family Dollar, Meijer, and Big Lots to provide them with the surplus goods that you no longer need.  Not only do you get rid of the items that you no longer need, as well as gaining some extra cash since we buy those items from you, we place these items in stores at prices that most people can afford.

We take perishable and non-perishable items.  We take surplus, returns, closeouts, irregulars and salvage Whatever it is don’t throw it away — we will take it!

Our largest inventories come from a variety of products like: tomato products  tomato paste, tomato puree and diced tomatoes; fruit and vegetable juice concentrates; and fresh, frozen, processed or canned fruits and canned  vegetables.

And, if you do happen to have an excess of freeze-dried fruit, we’ll take that, too.
For more information, contact us today at Lakeside Foods.